MissUndercity

RHOC: Vicki’s Son In Law Ryan is controlling vs Lydia’s mom and Vicki’s daughter Brianna’s double standard

It’s clear that Ryan grew up in one of those families where they have furniture no one is allowed to sit on…and Lydia grew up in one of those families where you don’t buy furniture you can’t afford to replace.

I’m not going to turn this into a Sociology lesson but let’s just suffice it to say the following:

In Ryan’s world putting feet up on a couch is a sign of disrespect and bad manners…in Lydia’s world putting feet on a couch means you’re using it.

One way isn’t good, bad or better than the other, they’re just different.  Ryan and Lydia’s mother, Judy, come from two different cultures.

Anyway, fuck the couch…

…the couch isn’t the issue…it’s where Ryan got off thinking he had the authority to kick ANYONE out of a house that isn’t his.

RHOC Ryan Culberson throwing Lydias mom out of Vickis house

“I’m going to throw her ass out, I’m not fucking around!”  Ryan flexes his angry face.

OK.  REALITY CHECK.

At what point does renting a room in your mother-in-law’s house give you the authority to reproach a guest at HER party?

I’ve just about had it up to my eyeballs with this guy parading around like he’s some sort of fucking feudal lord when he doesn’t even own any property…

…and SHAME ON VICKI FOR INDULGING IT!

Vicki should have checked his ass the second he tried to put up all those video cameras…don’t you live in a gated community?

Come on Vicki.  It wasn’t for safety, it was Ryan’s personal nanny-cam for YOU and YOUR DAUGHTER.  The sad part is that I know deep down inside you know this.

EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED

I suck at re-telling stories, so here’s the exact quotes of what happened between Ryan and Lydia’s mom:

Ryan: “Why do you got your feet on the couch?”

Lydia’s Mom (Judy): “If you don’t watch out I’m going to fairy dust you…and then you’ll be sparkly”

Ryan: “I’ll throw you out you don’t put your feet off my couch.  I ain’t fucking around…I don’t care how drunk you are, I’ll throw your ass out.”

Lydia’s Mom (Judy): “Excuse me sir, but I’ve had one drink… And don’t piss me off.”

Ryan: “I don’t give a fuck how many drinks you’ve had… I’ll throw you out right now.  Don’t say I won’t.”

Lydia’s Mom (Judy): “Who are you?”

Ryan: “Do I need to tell you?  I own, I live here so I will throw you out right now.”

***rofl***

Lydia’s Mom (Judy): “Oh, I should have known.”

***It’s funny how Ryan takes this to mean that Judy recognizes that he’s important…when clearly Judy’s tone was more like, “Haha oh I’ve come fact to face with the controlling little shit I’ve heard so much about…”  Probably better that her tone was lost on Ryan.***

Ryan: “Should have known, you want to leave?  It’ll happen like that *snaps fingers* “

Lydia’s Mom (Judy): “Well I’m sorry if I disrespected you…”

***It’s interesting how her tone changes here, she’s clearly been educated on how to deal with egocentric boys lol…she’s smarter than she lets on***

Ryan: “You are sorry, it’s fine”

Lydia’s Mom (Judy): “…but my feet hurt so I put them up.”

Ryan: “Well if your feet hurt go get a fucking massage.”

Lydia’s Mom (Judy): “Would you stop using the word ‘fuck’?”

***Here Judy lets him know she’s actually the alpha and he should respect her…and from here the drama spills out into the rest of the party***

It’s sad because Vicki was clearly mortified.  At no point does she want anyone to think that in her house a piece of furniture is more valuable than the comfort of a guest…

MILITARY EXCUSES

Why do I feel like somehow Ryan’s controlling behavior is going to be explained away at the reunion because he’s in the Marines or because he’s stressed about his impending deployment to Afghanistan.  I’m going to go right on ahead and throw down the bullshit flag right here.

It’s NOT OK.

RHOC Lydias mom assaults Gretchen with fairy dust

She might be an old stoner but Lydia’s Mom, Judy, is sharp as a tack!

It’s not manly, it’s not a product of being in the military and it certainly has nothing to do with deployment.

Ryan is socially awkward, clearly feels out of place around his wife’s family, and overcompensates by trying to control the situation. (yes, that was an oxford comma)

He lacks discipline and could use a good spanking…(not the fun kind with feathers).

The fact that anyone in their right mind would let this kid carry a GUN is absurd…considering he clearly LACKS THE CAPACITY to control himself at a freakin’ PARTY let alone follow orders in the desert.  Shit like that gets people killed.

It’s almost comical how he demands respect but lives in his mother-in-law’s house, running around acting like it’s his…

***Conspiracy Theory Alert***

I wonder if Vicki should be scared of Ryan and Brianna trying to create a case that she’s unfit to control her own assets because she’s a drunk or something and steal the house right from under her…because while I don’t think Brianna’s a bad person I do think that she’s got shit for self esteem and probably wouldn’t protest Ryan if her life depended on it.

WHERE ARE BRIANNA’S FRIENDS?

Brianna’s not a bad person…but just between us girls (RuPaul voice…:P) what’s the first thing that runs through your mind when one of your friends gets married and gains a bunch of weight.

RuPaul Drag Race RuPaul being fucking fabulous

Yes, I just wrote this entire segment and heard it in RuPaul’s voice.

I don’t need to say it…

Every time you hang out with her she acts like everything’s perfect.  Every time he’s embarrassing in public she pretends not to notice.  Every time he says something anyone with two brain cells could tell is absolute bullshit she has an explanation ready.

…until slowly but surely you stop hanging out with her and she disappears.

The crazy thing about RHOC is that it’s been on so long we’ve practically seen Brianna grow up…and yeah I’m not going to act like I know her because I’ve watched her on TV but SHIT ON A STICK if this doesn’t look so bloody out of character for her!!!

Brianna’s Controlling Double Standard

Where are her friends?  She’s still living in the house she grew up in and no one visits?  Ok, in her defense she is going to school and working full time with a baby…but she’s got a blessing in a mom who is willing to help (even if her mom is Vicki haha).

The question is…is it more important to her to try to control her mother’s choices…than it is to do what’s best for her baby.  If Briana and Ryan move out of Vicki’s house we’ll know the answer to that question.

RHOC Tamra Barneys dog is super adorable

I don’t have a picture of Brooks so here’s Tamara Barney’s dog. How cute is this little guy omg!

We get it, you hate Brooks…but acting like he endangers you or your baby is dramatically controlling and stupid as hell.

Am I the only one who finds it FUNNY AS FUCK that Vicki is doing to her daughter what her daughter did to her?  Namely, dating a guy she doesn’t approve of behind her back…

Now if Vicki was a Sith Lord she’d marry Brooks in a drive-through window and tell Briana about it at a fucking cocktail party…..shit.

Tap Tap No Eracies!

Brianna, my darling, let me be the first to tell you something you’re not going to want to hear: life is not an etch-a-sketch and deployment isn’t going to shake it.

Unless you two have a communicative relationship he is going to come home the same controlling child he left as…only with hardening experiences he will lord over you as to why you’re wrong every time you disagree with him.

Ryan is not a bad person…he just needs to grow the fuck up.

I can’t believe this is his second marriage (oh wait, yes I can…HA)!

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One comment on “RHOC: Vicki’s Son In Law Ryan is controlling vs Lydia’s mom and Vicki’s daughter Brianna’s double standard

  1. Crystal
    September 4, 2013

    I just watched this episode, and I wanted to punch Ryan in the face. His douchebaggery is way out of line.

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