RHOC: The New Real Housewife of Orange County is Awesome (ok, her name is really Lydia but you get the point…)!

OMG did this show need some new blood or what!  The newest Real Housewife is really the only reason I’m watching right now.

Vicki is a boring hypocrite…I can’t believe I watch a reality show about an insurance salesman.  Ugh…”like a good neighbor…please go away…” HA!

……but last season, in a fight with her daughter about Brooks, Vicki defended herself by saying her daughter’s boyfriend was married to someone else…I want to know more about that because there’s something about mr perfect army guy that I’m just not buying.  I get the desire to elope because Vicki would have probably just made the wedding about herself…(lol)…but something else is swimming under the surface here.  I don’t blame Vicki for being taken aback, if someone knocked up my daughter and THEN married her in a drive-through I’d probably raise an eyebrow or two…I almost get the feeling Vicki just wants him to get deployed so that it can be a story arc for the show…and she can, “be there” for her daughter (on camera ofcourse…). but I digress…

It’s going to be interesting to see Lydia interact with the girls because let’s be frank here, she’s the only one who isn’t desperately middle class.

RHOC new housewife Lydia McLaughlin armpit noise

According to her blog, Lydia makes this monkey armpit noise every time her drink is a little too strong. She’s the best, I LOVE IT!

Oh Lydia, you’re so wonderful.  Please don’t make me regret saying that!

In my lab of awesomeness (you know, where I created Carole Radziwill, HA!), if I could have made another fabulous “Real Housewife” it would be you….I fully expect to wake up and have drempt the whole premiere episode…lol

  1. Your website doesn’t look like a couple of hobo hipsters leaching wifi at the neighborhood Starbucks convinced you they’re web designers.
  2. You have a solid personal brand (LydiaM) that reflects your personality.
  3. Your jewellery line benefits iSanctuary charity, helping victims of human trafficking.
  4. You are educated and have a real job.
  5. You seem incredibly grounded and secure in yourself.
  6. You didn’t marry into money.
  7. Your children and your marriage light your life.
  8. That funny thing you do with your armpit.

I think this season is going to be a real treat.  For the first time we have a real Real Housewife of Orange County who seems pretty secure in herself, grounded and not completely egotistical about it.

RHOC new housewife and hubby

Lydia and hubby enjoy date night, and they actually seem to like each other…holy crap!

I’m going to go ahead and guess that Heather’s going to kiss Lydia’s ass and try to get between Alexis and Lydia’s friendship.  Lydia has real money and more connections, Heather’s a hater but she’s not so stupid as to scare away someone who could be useful to her in the future.  I just hope Lydia sees through it and graciously excuses herself from the drama.

I honestly feel bad for Heather. 

Heather looks nervous, insecure and socially awkward, half the time I have to stop myself short of feeling embarassed for her.   She’s missing something and overcompensates by wearing Emily Post around her neck.

She’s so worked up about doing things how she thinks sophisticated people are supposed to do them instead of just having fun.  It’s like she’s terrified someone’s going to notice she’s out of place or doesn’t belong.

Somewhere along the line, Heather got confused and equated sophistication to stuffy discomfort and comfort to loud and out of place.  The biggest joke is that this, and most of her silly overdramaticized soliloquies about sophistication, have more in common with a Rodney Dangerfield movie, some overdramatized (is that possible? sadly, yes.) Jane Austen and some 80’s satire taken literally than actual reality.

RHOC heather dubrow funny face

“Oh yeah, well I can do the best duck face because I took a class in duck faces and have been studying them since I was a teenager, plus my husband is a surgeon!”  Haha, Holy shit I just realized she’s not wearing a Chanel necklace in this picture. Omg! She must feel nakid!

Example:  Bow-Gate last season

———-> A rude party guest ate part of Heather’s cake before she had a chance to cut it….

  • Normal hostess reaction: laugh it off and never invite that person (and blackball her as a +1) to a party ever again…
  • Heather’s reaction: confront the guest Jersey Shore style, refuse to accept the guest’s apology, talk about the incident with other guests and berate the guest again before kicking her out of the party.

REALLY?  You just made that entire night about a rude guest!  WTF is wrong with you.  You need to attend the David and Yolanda Foster School-of-Mitigating-Attention-Whores-and-Not-Letting-Them-Hijack-Your-Party…did you see how they handled Kyle Richards?  Epic.

Unfortunately, Heather’s dreadfully unaware of the fact that the most sophisticated thing a woman can do is have fun, regardless of who is watching.

Deep down inside Heather and Alexis are exactly alike…and Heather’s afraid people will notice if she hangs out with Alexis so she does what every other insecure girl does…acts like the reason she won’t hang out is because she’s better.

I hope having a friend like Lydia will help Alexis with her self confidence.

You know how everyone was all fired up last season to see Heather and Alexis in one room together because, “Heather is what Alexis wishes she was/pretends to be…” blah

Well Lydia McLaughlin is what Heather wishes she was/pretends to be…

…at a certain point I think trying too hard should be painful…oh wait, I think it is, they just call it stress.  HA!  I wish Heather the best but she really needs to chill out before she gives herself an aneurysm.  Life is too short to argue over onion rings…

(although part of me thinks that argument really had nothing to do with onion rings…)

3 comments on “RHOC: The New Real Housewife of Orange County is Awesome (ok, her name is really Lydia but you get the point…)!

  1. oh.no.pepper
    April 19, 2013

    I am loving Lydia. She seems so totally real and rad, like other people have commented on other RH websites, she reminds me of happy times with My Little Pony and Rainbow Brite. It’s kinda of weird to see her order a Lemon Drop, is that her first drink ever? Also, I think it will be interesting to see how the other women who are clearly gnashing and clawing to capture an ideal of beauty and wealth to be confronted with someone who can’t be bothered she already seems to have it and be comfortable with it. Onion rings really, everyone loves onion rings!!! I think I finally became aware that Heather’s facade is crumbling.

  2. Cleo
    April 27, 2013

    I liked Lydia too, she’s sorta dorktastic!

    Did you notice as soon as Heather came on the scene wearing Chanel from head to toe, Tamra started wearing a lot of Chanel? What a follower.

    Do Heather and her husband bicker like Paul and Adrienne? Uh oh, that fight WASN’T about onion rings, was it!

    • MissUndercity
      May 10, 2013

      “Dorktastic!” I love it!

      You know, I did notice Tamara’s Chanel sunglasses when she was touring the gym in the first episode and I had to do a double take. My best guess? She’s borrowing most of that shit from Heather…

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