BGC: Bad Girls Club or Sloppy Drunk Slut’s Club?

You be the judge…

Really, this show is trying my patience.  I’ve watched every episode of this show.  Yeah, not entirely proud of that but I’m sure that my resume would stand out if someone was hiring a consultant on Bad Girls Club viewership…

BGC sloppy drunk in bathtub

Oh, hello, don’t mind us, we’re going to treat this poor bathtub like a clown-car for the next 20 minutes.

I’m going to say this series went down hill after Tanisha’s season.  Tanisha gained notoriety as a big girl who banged pots together and screamed at people.

Tanisha was funny.  She got a job and several appearance gigs because she was funny.  She also set a benchmark for how to break-out after the show into a series of paid positions that require no education or experience.

Now every girl on the show is trying to be her or surpass her.  This show started out as something a group of poorly behaved young women did during that lonely summer before starting grad-school (I lol’d)…now, as with most reality shows, the Bad Girls Club has become a resume builder for talentless wannabe fame whores.

It’s annoying as fuck and eventually, as with any escalating progression of extremes, someone is going to get seriously hurt.

I’m especially scared now that they’re filming in Atlanta.  These girls know about taking out their earrings and greasing up.  Shit just got real.

This show has a lame formula:

  1. The wannabe socialite
  2. The token fat chick
  3. The geeky/tatted/hipster/lesbian girl
  4. The girl from Chicago
  5. The girl from New Jersey
  6. The girl from the West Coast
  7. The crazy/lightweight girl
  8. The people pleaser
  9. The sociopath/passive-aggressive

Note: The people pleaser and the crazy/lightweight girl might be the same person.  Girl 1, 2, 3, 7, or 8 will always be from the South, New York or the West Coast.  Girl 9 is a gem (or annoying as fuck piece of shit, *ehem* Anne “Annie” Andersen instigating shit then pressing charges a few seasons ago…wtf was that?) only lucky enough to be found for select seasons.

BGC sloppy drunk new jersey

This is Nicole Vargas, BGC Season 10’s kinda chunky sloppy drunk New Jersey Skrillex lookin’ chick who likes pizza and hates tee shirts (i think).

These girls aren’t ‘bad’…they’re just the unfortunate product of shitty parenting.  It’s almost annoying to watch a group of marginally attractive young women get sloppy drunk every week.  That’s not ‘bad’, that’s just stupid.

For lack of the Oxygen Network film crew these are the girls who wind up in those gut wrenching pictures that show up on facebook and eventually result in criminal prosecution…you know what I’m talking about.

A bad girl has her wits about her and is always ready to settle her business if shit gets rowdy at the club.

BGC Janae Bradford aka "The Houston Hellraiser"

Another sloppy drunk ‘Bad Girl’ collapses at the club. Thankfully this one went home voluntarily before she killed herself trying to keep up.

This is not fun to watch.  This is annoying as fuck.  If I wanted to see a bunch of sloppy drunks in short skirts falling down at the club I’d hop a plane to *insert shithole town here with crappy clubs and a high alcoholic population of unattractive uneducated women here*.

So, three episodes in what’s my take on Season 10?

             Smartest girl so far: Janae…for sending herself home.  She was either going to get seriously hurt or go home in a coma éthylique (how do you say that in English?)

            Most annoying girl so far: Nicole.  I know you’re from New Jersey but seriously, do you have to be a walking, slurring stereotype?  Now taking donations for the Nicole Vargas charity elocution lesson fund.  Just hearing her talk makes my ears bleed.

            Favorite girl so far: Valentina  Anyanwu.  She’s beautiful, educated and truly self confident (but she did lose points with me for dumping food all over Janae, bitch was leaving and that was lame).  You have no idea how long I’ve waited for them to cast a REAL all girls boarding school bitch.

If the Bad Girls Club is a microcosm, a boarding school for girls is the real life macrocosm.  Only the strong survive and the weak can’t go home.

Private dayschools on the East Coast are a dime a dozen but nothing compares to the raw primal survival of the fittest that galvanizes one for life in the real world like an all girls boarding school.  These cute little ‘bad’ girls have no idea what they’re in for.  Valentina is going to eat them alive.


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