RHOA: Coochie Crack, Ass Crack and BET Beauties

Yeah, yeah so I guess they added this chick who used to be Miss USA.  I thought she’d be cool.  I’ve met some Miss USA girls, they were pretty cool, why wouldn’t this one be just as cool?  How about because she’s an obnoxious mean girl hater?  Oh, yeah, that definately must be it.

Dear Miss USA girls everywhere, I still love you, but seriously…Miss Kenya Moore, chiiiiiiild…

so other than throwing some serious shade at our reigning codependent supermodel (that would be madame Cynthia), lady Moore had a little too much to say to some unsuspecting young women who decided to brave the judgment process for the chance to become BET Magazine’s “Beauty of the Week”

Here are some of the potential beauties, and the ex Miss USA’s response to each of them.  You be the judge of the newest hater *ehem* real housewife *ehem* fiance *ehem* single lady dating a towing company owner long distance for the past two years *ehem* whatever she’s just a hater.

Enter the judges:

From left to right, Ex Miss USA 1993, Some Rap Dude, Codependent Supermodel, Deeply Embarassed BET Rep.

Here are the victims, the real quotes, and captions representing my opinion:


Kenya ex Miss USA: “I have a question, have you ever seen me in a magazine?”

Victim #1:  (girl is speechless and stutters attempting to answer the question) “Ok, um, I, uh…”

Kenya ex Miss USA: “I’m the one who asked you the question, look at me”

Bitch please, you? in a magazine? Do I LOOK that old?!?!?! (well at least that’s what I hope this beautiful young lady was thinking…)


Kenya ex Miss USA: “That’s a man”

Kenya ex Miss USA: “No, I’m serious, I was looking for an adam’s apple”

Haha you’re just mad I can eat as much ice cream as I want and for all the crazy diets you could never be this thin. (well that’s what I hope she was thinking)


Kenya ex Miss USA: “I’m not trying to be the mean girl, but why are you here?”

Some Rap Star Guy: “Behave!”

Kenya ex Miss USA: “I’m just sayin'”

Some Rap Star Guy: “Behave!”

Kenya ex Miss USA: “Well I’m just being truthful.”

Cynthia: “In the spirit of Jet Beauty all is welcome we said that.”

Kenya ex Miss USA: “Sorry”

Some Rap Star Guy: “Yo, man, you gotta cut it out, ok?”

Kenya ex Miss USA: “No I don’t.”

Haha oh silly lady, you’re thick, but not in the way that you think… (well at least that’s what I hope she was thinking)


Enter victim #4.

I’m just so happy to be here…

Kenya ex Miss USA: “Is this strip club JET or regular JET?”

Rap Star Guy: “Nice smile”

Cynthia: “can you turn around a little bit”

****/Let me tell you what happened here…this young lady bought a SET.  Unfortunately her bust is a “medium” and her booty is a “large”.  She bought the set that fit her bust and figured if she tied it tight enough her booty would be ok.  At the end of the day baggy boobs are worse than a little booty crack. I don’t think she was trying to disrespect anyone or in any way thought that crack was appropriate./****

Haters gunna hate!

Kenya: “Say no to crack!”

Clearly horrified young lady: “Is there crack? Is it showing?!?!? I’m SO sorry! I’m so sorry!!!”

Kenya: “Lotsa crack, crack in the back, almost crack in the front…you obviously didn’t have time to shave.”

Cynthia: “Well the fact that you can actually put that on, and walk in here, and work the runway…AMEN at ya!”

Rap Star Guy: “You representin’ the JET Beauty very well”

Kenya: “That is just…can we have a time out…how can you come to an audition showing your coochie crack and your ass crack and think that’s appropriate?

Random assistant guy: “I just think there’s a respectful way, to let some…some of them are coming here, this is their first time modeling…”

Kenya: “Yeah, you need to stop.  Excuse me, who are you and why are you talking to me?…Security!”

I’m going to go out on a limb and guess that Miss Kenya’s muscle is more of a “personal argument ender” than a “bodyguard”…



What bothers the FUCK out of me is that each of the aforementioned victims were CONFIDENT AS FUCK walking down that runway…and then some irrelevant ex-beauty queen had to go and read them like a hollywood-made stereotypical high school cheerleader.

I am really disappointed.  I wanted to like Miss Kenya, I thought she was strong, accomplished and seemed like a great role model for girls who aspre to become power women.  All I saw after this episode was a jealous older woman with money trying to tear down some beautiful aspiring young women.

The problem I have with this is Kenya then tried to play it off!!!!!!!

——-> “My criticism is only to help.  If someone hadn’t taken me aside and shown me the correct way to dress for auditions, I would never book a job.”

*ehem #bullshit*

The key words here: someone TOOK YOU ASIDE.  What you did to these young women was ugly and unnecessary.  You owe each and every one of them an apology.

Maybe Kenya was trying to make her mark on the show and went a little too far.  She’s new and I’m going to give her the benefit of the doubt ’cause it’s only episode one.  Some people overcompensate for nervousness with meanness so that no one will think they’re weak.  …but seriously, she does owe all those girls a FUCKING APOLOGY.

Cynthia said, “We’re not here to tear anyone down, that’s pointless and just meanspirited. As a former Miss USA  I just thought it was a no brainer, like she’s a smart girl…”

Dear Cynthia, sorry to break it to you but, you’re not exactly the best judge of character…

5 comments on “RHOA: Coochie Crack, Ass Crack and BET Beauties

  1. Pingback: RHOA: Kenya Moore vs Porsha Williams-Stewart « MissUndercity

  2. krystlestyles
    January 6, 2013

    Thank you for saying exactly what I was feeling. Lol. I am Victim #4. Kenya is a disappointment, it sad for her to show this side of a beauty queen. She’s also a hi burial liar. I never called her a thanked her.

    • MissUndercity
      January 12, 2013

      Haha you’re welcome! I’m glad you read my blog! There is absolutely no excuse for how she treated you and the other young women that day. The fact that she lied to Cynthia (about u calling) to make it seem palatable makes the situation even more disgusting.

      Thank you for clearing that part up! On the show it sounded like u wanted Kenya to be ur mentor or something and I was like, “You can’t be serious, what’s wrong w/that girl!”.

      Looks like what comes around goes around, a pathological liar is usually their own worst enemy…and I’ve never seen someone singlehandedly manage to blackball themselves so quickly. Lol!

  3. krystlestyles
    January 6, 2013

    Reblogged this on krystlestyles's Blog and commented:
    I certainly do agree with a few of your opinions towards Kenya on the subject. I am victim #4, Kenya was out if order and completely disrespectful. The hate that she exudes is utterly disgusting. I also feel she owes us all a serious apology, but I really doubt Kenya Moore has it in her to do so! “Gone With The Wind, Disgrace”

    KrystleStyles. On Twitter and Ig

  4. colm
    February 3, 2013

    She said “I ain’t mad at cha”

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